The Debate: Working Mum vs SAHM

Having been at both side of the fence, I've been asking myself the question lately 'which is more tiring: Being a working mum or a stay at home mum?'. Since I've tasted both, I thought I'd share some perspective.

Being a SAHM Facts:
1) You get to spend time with your kids

2) It's physically and mentally draining. You are constantly watching over your kid(s) like a hawk, feeding them or chasing or cleaning after them. You have your third eye on them every single time even if you're catching up with your g/fs in mother's/play group. Not.Easy!
3) More chances of you getting 'me time' because when the hub comes back home, you have more right to have 'me' time vs him.
4) You get to catch up w sleep when your kids are having their afternoon naps (Not always the case but definitely more likely to than a working mum that's for sure)
5) Easier to follow a routine (eg. kids can sleep much better b/c it's easy to implement a routine which means it's easier to set the household routine like preparing meals on time too!)
6) More chances of getting housework done.
7) You lose touch of your working brain. You speak like a child, you think like a child, you act like a child and heck you might as well smell like them too!

Being a Working Mum:

1) Albeit your kids are being looked after someone else, you are still having to be a constant taxi driver. There is a lot of frantic rushing here and rushing there just to make sure you make it in time for work/pick up the kids etc.

2) You are constantly thinking. You go to work and you have to think using the very 'lack' of brain cells thanks to the lack of sleep. When you come home, you can not rest, instead, you put on your mother's hat. You are still thinking; Thinking of what to pack for them the next day, the grocery shopping list, the bills to pay, what to eat for dinner, what clothes to put them in and the list goes on and on..You feed them, you take them for a bath, you brush their teeth, unwax their ears, cut their nails etc etc.  It is not only physically exhausting but mentally as well.
3) The chances of 'me' time or catching up with friends is very slim because you feel guilty that you hardly see your kids on weekdays so you end up trying to soak in every quality time you have w your family whenever possible.
4) If you have a bad night because your kids are sick or just can't sleep, it means that even though you feel like a zombie the next day, you still have to march on. You still have to be an alert taxi driver, still have to speak eloquently at work, still have to think, still can not yawn in business meetings, basically you still have to function like you've had 8 hours of precious sleep!
5) Preparation of your family meals become quick and easy vs cooking with much love
6) Errands/housework are done usually when your kids are asleep (ie weeknights - I've hung clothes out at 10pm before in the freezing cold.. Brrrr! or weekends) or if you can afford it, you outsource it :) (sadly I do not have this luxury! oh how I miss Singapore! lol)

So my net conclusion is that both is as equally hard. However in terms of having me time and time with your family in general, definitely SAHM benefits from this tremendously. Whereas working mums are usually time deprived. Any 'me' time usually gets transfered to family time by default and if you are lucky to have the occasional 'me time', you tend to feel guilty afterwards for not spending it with your family. True fact!

Since I've done both, which one would I choose you ask? well if I had my way, I would definitely be a permanent part-time so that you get a taste of both worlds! Still work so that you can dress up exercise your brain and get pocket money for it and at the same time spend all your hard earned money on them are able to spend the quality time with your kids.

Sadly, after 5 months of working part-time, I am finally back on full-time work as of this month. This means I can no longer take Z to swimming classes. Instead, I have to hand this privilege over to my mother. I am so sad about it but what can you do? life must go on... On the upside, I get to have more pocket money to shop shop shop give my family a better life... ch-ching! $_$

Being a mum is not easy. Period!